Primate Story : Mookie's Story
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Atrocities occur
and it is mandatory that people be held accountable for their
actions. Wednesday, July 2,1997 I was in a local grocery store
with my capuchin monkey, Mookie, shopping, as I have done for the
past 2 years with him. While I patiently waited in the check-out
line between two local woman, he was visiting a man (while still
attached to the leash and myself as he is always ) accompanying
several children (I am not sure if they were from a camp or
where). I spoke to all of them and answered their questions
pertaining to the work Mookie does. He became a part of our
family at several weeks of age and turned 2 years old in April. I
had been granted a permit from our State Dept. of Inland
Fisheries and Wildlife for him to be allowed into the state of
Maine specifically to participate in therapeutic type endeavors.
I had done research for over 2 years prior to acquiring Mookie,
before coming to a decision that I would be competent in the
undertaking I was about to embark on. In May 1995, I began a
journey that ended in devastation not only for Mookie, and
myself, but for many many others as well. That fateful day as he
leapt back to me, he quickly decided, as only a monkey seems to
be able to do, unfortunately, to try to leap to the back of the
woman ahead of us in the line. I grabbed him in midair but not in
time to prevent him from grabbing at her hair and succeeding. I
disentangled his fingers and he had not pulled a strand of her
hair out. I scolded him for his actions and apologized to the
woman for his behavior. She ignored me. I paid for my groceries
and left the store.
The following day two state game wardens arrived at my house to
talk to me about "The Bite". I asked them in complete
perplexion...What bite? I had no idea what they were referring
to. They repeated, "The Bite. The bite yesterday". And
again I asked them what they were talking about. They proceeded
to inform me there had been a complaint issued by the woman in
the grocery store, that Mookie had scratched and bitten her. I
was in total disbelief and replied that Mookie had grabbed her
hair and might possibly have accidentally scratched her but,
there was no way he bit her! They then brought up an issue
pertaining to the required permit necessary to keep Mookie in
compliance with their regulations. I informed them I had sent in
my paperwork, after calling Dale Clark (the person in charge of
licensing and permits) to inquire what they expected in the way
of documentation. I sent in my report in March 1997 and never
received a denial of the renewal application. I, unfortunately,
had not noticed that I had never been sent a paper of approval
either. I had sent a similar report the preceding year and my
permit was renewed with no problem , the only difference this
year was that I had increased the amount of time spent doing the
therapeutic work. (Each year as Mookie grew older I had planned
to increase the work we would do together in this area.
I would like to add here a partial list of the things I do so as
to clarify why that paper could have gone unnoticed. I have been
a therapeutic foster care parent for the state of Maine Youth
Center (I care for teen boys that have been in jail)for the past
4 years (the previous 11 years doing regular foster care
parenting), I have been a licensed wildlife rehabilitator (state,
and federal) for about 19 years, I have been a Sunday School
teacher for our local Methodist Church for about 17 years, a
volunteer staff for our local teen center for 3 years, the
biological mom of a 17 and 11 yr. old boys, a horse rancher for
the past 28 years and during a majority of that time it has been
as a single parent. I have also in the past been instrumental in
developing a therapeutic riding program with the Paso Fino horses
I raise. I acted as Executive Director, riding instructor, and
performed many various duties as Public Relations, fund raising,
caretaker for the horses and educator for this program that grew
to serve up to 25 clients riding weekly. I would also like to add
that the only monetary gain I received was the stipend paid to me
for the foster care I did. All the other aforementioned
activities were purely donations of my time as a volunteer, doing
things I enjoyed. I looked at the things I did and was doing as
spiritual gifts I had been given to share with others willing to
accept them. I was second mom to many of the at-risk teens in our
town as well. They felt my home was their home and my door was
never locked. I have had the local police call after midnight
inquiring, could I take in two homeless teen boys that had been
found sleeping in the local Laundromat? and my reply as always
was, "Yes". I have walked downstairs in the morning to
find a woman sleeping on my couch, who knew she could find safety
here from an abusive husband. People are constantly bringing
animals for me to aid to the best of my ability and those that
were beyond my expertise, I would bring to our local veterinarian
hospital which donated its medical expertise. Is it a wonder I
hadn't noticed my renewal had not been sent?
I asked the name of the woman who claimed to have been bitten and
I was told to call the chief of police. I was also to produce
documentation as to the medical records on the monkey and get
those to the police as well. I was in total bewilderment as to
the situation and continued to try to question what exactly was
going on. The warden told me Mookie was not supposed to be out in
the public without being in a carrier, if at all. I replied to
him that I wanted to know why none of the wardens, including him,
had informed me of that when I would see them in town, at the
town offices, and also why they had not spoken up then in
relation to my permit situation. Warden Neal Wilkes insisted he
had never seen me in town, which is not true.
I was not getting any answers and subsequently called Chief Bell
of our local police force. He would not give me the name of the
woman who had accused Mookie of biting her and told me he
"was pushing the case". I informed him Mookie was up to
date on all medical needs and the records would be sent to him
directly by the veterinary hospital. I then called Dale Clark at
Fish & Wildlife to try to resolve the paperwork issue. This
seemed to be where the plot thickens. She informed me I did not
have a valid license for Mookie due to my lack of fulfillment of
their requirements for the permit. I inquired as to what exactly
was lacking as I had sent her everything she had requested in
March. She countered with the following : I had not associated
myself with the Helping Hands program, I had taken Mookie out in
public not in a carrier, and had taken him places he was not
allowed. I gave her valid answers to her statements and was met
with total rejection of my presentations. I informed Dale that I
had attempted on several occasions to contact the Helping Hands
program, left messages on their machine and even had written a
couple times to inquire as to the status of my application to
their program. Dale informed me that Helping Hands had never
heard of me. I called the woman , Jean Amaral and she stated to
me that she had never said they had never heard of me. I had
copies of my correspondence to them and went so far as to search
my old phone bills to find their number on my bill. The next
thing I see in the local newspaper coverage is a statement that
Helping Hands had never heard of me.
I proceeded to call the woman who had been behind me in the
grocery store line, (Brenda Richardson), to ask her the name of
the woman ahead of us and she was not able to remember her name
either. I asked her about the incident and she did not feel that
Mookie had bitten the woman either.
I was told, by the game wardens, Mookie was not to leave my
premises until the issues had been resolved, which I complied
with. I would like to add here that Mookie had been with me 24
hours a day since he had arrived in our home. This commitment to
him had resulted from the information I had discovered during the
years of research I did previous to him coming to me. It was
deemed very important for the proper emotional and behavioral
development of Mookie to assure that level of interaction with
him. I felt I was capable of that commitment to him. This left me
with no choice but to remain at my home until this issue had been
resolved. I accepted the conditions with no disagreement and
proceeded to comb through my immense amount of documentation I
had accumulated over the past 5 years. I gathered up papers one
by one to be brought to a local office store by a friend be
copied and given to the Fish & Wildlife. I was not given a
time frame and worked diligently at amassing the necessary
documentation. During all of this, I was still wondering,
"What the hell was going on?"
On Friday, a friend called and told me the name of the woman was,
(Linda MacDonald, the wife of Dan MacDonald, who owned MacDonald
Motors in town). My friend also informed me that the only problem
these people were having with the situation was that I had not
apologized and all they wanted was for me to pay the doctor bill
and for a tetanus shot. I called the dealership to try to reach
the people and left a message with an employee asking they call
me. I also sent a card apologizing for the incident, not the
alleged bite. At that point I felt I was making headway of all
this situation.
Several days passed and the next thing I knew....... it was
Monday afternoon, July 7,1997 and I glanced out my window to see
two game wardens, a police car and a truck drive swiftly into my
dooryard, all at once. Everyone stepped out of their vehicles and
proceeded up to my home. I was informed Mookie was being
confiscated due to the fact I did not have a valid permit in my
possession. I looked at them in disbelief. My mind was racing,
thinking what was going on and what could be done. We proceeded
to negotiate for about 2-3 hours. The wardens insisting I give
Mookie up to them, which in turn he would be given to (Norman
Waycott) of the Saco Zoo. Norman was the person they used as a
drop off point for confiscated animals. He also is on their Board
of Directors, which determines who is and is not granted
permission to obtain an exotic animal. I might add here that I
was informed that Maine does not give out permission for pet
monkeys, yet Mr. Waycott was in possession of several capuchin
monkeys. The Portland Press Herald had done a story the previous
year on a Black Swan stolen from Boston Gardens, which Norman had
supplied to Boston on a lease type arrangement. In that article
it stated Norman raised monkeys. I also had been informed by the
USDA (United State Dept. of Agriculture) agent, when he was here
to inspect my facilities for Mookie for me to be granted a class
C - exhibition permit, that Norman had told him his monkeys were
pets. I had inquired because the conditions I had seen his
monkeys on the day I had visited his establishment the previous
year, were not up to the standards required by the USDA, as far
as I could see. Norman had been given a zoo permit for his
menagerie but the monkeys were not included, stated the agent,
due to their pet status. I have since been curious as to the
disposition of the other monkeys and other animals brought to
Norman by the Fish & Wildlife. I personally believe there is
a conflict of interest in this man's positions with the state.
Due to the conditions I had seen at the Saco Zoo I decided to do
anything in my power to prevent Mookie from being brought there.
I would have gone so far as to have him euthanized rather than be
subjected to having to go there. I made several phone calls as
the negotiations continued.
Finally I was able to reach Brian Hawkins, a local lawyer (no
relation to me) and he was successful in negotiating an agreeable
compromise. Mookie would go to the Bridgton Veterinary Clinic for
a quarantine period, while the issue was addressed further. I
loaded him into a carrier and had to practically beg to be
allowed to ride with him in the vehicle transporting him to the
vets. Upon arrival, the quarantine room was readied and I took
Mookie to it. One of the most difficult things I have ever had to
do in my life was to place him in that cage and lock the door. I
had no way of explaining to him why I was, in his eyes,
abandoning him, and as I walked away he screamed for me. You must
remember for practically the entire 2 years of his life he had
been in my company. He went everywhere I did. To town to the
stores, church, the teen center, and the list goes on and on. He
slept with me and showered with me, sitting on a homemade shelf
washing himself as I washed myself. He and I were so closely
bonded that this was devastating to both of us for him to be left
in that cage. I returned the following morning to visit him. I
had been reluctantly given permission to visit him but was not
allowed to take him out of the cage to hold him. When I entered
the room, expecting to hear a welcoming greeting, I was ignored.
Mookie turned his back on me and would not speak to me with any
of his normal greeting sounds. I was absolutely crushed that this
emotional destructiveness was happening. I stayed for over an
hour and not until it was time for me to leave would he interact
with me, and then barely at all. As I rose to leave he grabbed
for my hair, pulling me to him, as if to plead with me to take
him with me, and I had to turn away and again leave him there. I
cannot begin to describe the agony I was going through. I felt he
too was going through the very same distress.
I began my attempt to resolve this issue satisfactorily by
driving to my lawyers with many papers I had gathered to present
my case to regain possession of Mookie. I made numerous phone
calls. My lawyer made calls. The only thing I was ended up being
guaranteed of, was that the Fish & Wildlife would NEVER issue
me a permit to have Mookie again in the state of Maine.
They began citing me with the requirements they insisted I had
not met. Mookie was not being kept in a carrier when out in
public. I had not complied with them about my association with
the Helping Hands program. Mookie was not allowed out in the
public under any circumstances. And last but far from least, I
did not have in my possession a current permit. I was given a
summons for the lack of a permit. The entire situation became
worse and worse and I began to worry more and more that Mookie at
some point would be handed over to Norman Waycott. He could not
stay at the vet's forever.
I proceeded to find an alternative for his placement, realizing I
was not going to be given access to him in the state of Maine, at
least not in the near future. After many phone calls and pulling
of strings, Mookie was granted permission to leave the state of
Maine to go to a wonderful sanctuary in Florida, The Wise
Monkeys. It was a place I had made arrangements with, for Mookie
to go to, if I should die before him. The facility is entirely
privately funded by the owners and is very clean and the primates
housed there are cared for with the utmost responsibility. I made
arrangements for Mookie to be driven down there and he left
Wednesday, the 9th to head to Florida.
The minute Mookie had crossed the border out of Maine and was
safely out of harms way of being placed at the Saco Zoo, I
prepared to do battle with the people involved with this
situation. I was going to get answers and I wanted complete
explanations of how this situation could have gotten to this
point. While I continued to search my papers for documentation to
back up my position, others had apparently been busy as well.
People had heard what had happened and were calling and stopping
in to ask what they could do to help. I asked that they pray for
Mookie's safety first and foremost. The next thing I knew
newspaper reporters, TV and radio stations were calling me to ask
what happened. The teens in town had been spreading the word
about my situation. I found myself answering many questions over
and over. I had decided that if Mookie would never be allowed to
be with me and do the therapeutic work we did in the communities
that I would pack up and leave the state of Maine to do our work
elsewhere. When that news spread, I had teens calling me on the
phone crying, adults (women and men) crying at the idea of the
loss, our leaving would bring. I was overwhelmed by the amount of
support pouring out of my community. I finally came to the
conclusion that perhaps there was a chance at a resolution to
this disaster. I began to inquire about the governor of our state
giving Mookie a pardon and allowing him to be returned to me so
we could continue our therapeutic work.
That is how the situation stands at this time.... I am including
documents to substantiate my position: Mookie's medical records,
copies of the paperwork sent to the Fish & Wildlife,
documents to show that I had adhered to the guidelines set up by
Helping Hands (from a pirated copy of their manual I was able to
procure from a student where I had given a presentation at USM in
Gorham in an Anthropology class), Helping Hands had never
returned my phone calls after I had sent them an application
three plus years ago nor did they reply to the follow up letter I
wrote them (in fact they denied ever having received a completed
application from me according to the Fish & Wildlife, when in
fact I have a copy of what I had sent them) , documents stating
animals in a therapeutic line of work or even training being
allowed in public places, and last but not least the permit
itself stating the few guidelines I was expected to follow, which
I had followed. I also was informed, second hand, by New
Hampshire Dept. of Fish & Wildlife that I should have been
completely within my rights to have assumed my permit was valid
as I had never received a denial of my permit from the Maine
Dept. of Fish & Wildlife, when asked by the press about this
situation they were given no comment. The entire situation is
filled with inconsistencies and should never have happened in the
first place. This is not even the complete account there is more
to it but this is a fair amount of information for one to access
as to the situation.
The Continuing Saga
One hundred and thirty three days have passed since Mookie
arrived at The Wise Sanctuary, in July of 1997. It is now
November 21,1997 and Mookie is finally home with me in Maine
again. The following is my account of the days between his
departure and final arrival to be reunited with me. This is a
depressing presentation and one of the most debilitating
situations I have ever had to deal with in my entire life.
After Mookie's arrival in Florida, July 9, 1997, I began my
descent into hell. The more I tried to facilitate a positive
resolution to this deplorable situation the worse it seemed to
get. Letters written on Mookie's and my behalf, to our Governor,
Angus King, were sent directly to Maine Fish and Wildlife, the
very same people who were responsible for this miscarriage of
justice to begin with. Phone calls and letters were of absolutely
no use in trying to resolve this issue. I called everywhere and
everyone I could possibly think of for help and got no
constructive answers or help anywhere. Leads led nowhere, local
lawyers wanted no part of this as they had no idea how to
approach this situation. I was without recourse, with the
exception of moving out of the state I had given myself to, if I
was to be reunited with Mookie again. Over and over again in my
mind ran the thoughts, why me?? what had I done to deserve this??
what could I do and where could I turn for help?? As I felt I had
just about reached my breaking point, I remembered the power of
prayer, and I began praying. I prayed for Mookie to be safe, I
prayed for strength for me and most of all I prayed for the
salvation of the people who had been responsible for this
terrible occurrence to escalate into such a disastrous mess. When
people called and asked what they could do to help..... all I
could answer them with was, "pray" for the for
mentioned things, and pray long and hard. It was the only
constructive thing that could be done at that point.
The newspapers had not been kind in their assessment of this
encounter, saying basically, a "Pet Monkey" had been
confiscated from local woman. I called and asked that the label
"pet" be replaced by the proper term "therapy
monkey" and the request was outright refused. The article
was posted in local papers as well as seen in The Boston Globe
and a Florida newspaper (to my knowledge, I don't know if it was
published anywhere else). I sent my account of the occurrence to
many newspapers, none of which ever published my side of the
story. A radio talk show interviewed me and television stations
came to my home to interview me as well. Yet still I found no
governmental official willing to intervene in my behalf. I was
becoming very disillusioned with the entire state of Maine.
I received a call a few weeks after Mookie's departure, informing
me of a lawyer who had expressed interest in my situation. Martin
Schindler, a divorce lawyer from South Portland, had seen
something about my plight and offered to represent me for free,
as he had all animals' best interests at heart. The first
question he asked of me when I went to his office to confer about
my problem was, "Is Mookie all right?" This led me to
believe I had finally found someone who truly wanted to help me
and was in a position to be able to help as well. I showed him
all my paperwork and explained the story from my point of view.
When I had finished, he agreed to do all within his power to help
me resolve this, gratis. I returned home with a lighter heart,
never once imaging the battle had just barely begun.
After reviewing my information, Mr. Schindler suggested I reapply
(again) for a renewal permit for Mookie. I did this, expecting a
reply within a month. The month passed and no answer. I was given
permission to call Fish and Wildlife, by my lawyer, to ask for a
decision and was told by the Dept. (Major Tourtelotte) they would
not make a decision until the court case was decided. More
sitting and waiting, wondering, and worrying. When was this all
going to be over and done with?
Each day felt like a year. I found myself unable to go to town as
the few times I attempted to go into a place I had gone
previously with Mookie, the tears would start streaming down my
face. It was a combination of the feeling of my loss of a partner
as well as the feeling of total helplessness over a very unfair
and seemingly unethical procedure being forced upon me. I finally
resigned myself to the fact that going to town was not something
I was willing to subject myself to, and during the one hundred
thirty five days Mookie was gone, I went to places in town less
than a half dozen times. I could not even bring myself to go to
my church as I felt I would fall totally apart there and have to
be carried out in a "basket". These feelings
overwhelmed me and I had absolutely no control over my thoughts
and emotions. I had never in my life, in all my years of dealing
with the strife that I had faced, felt so debilitated and
helpless. I had always considered myself a survivor and I was
just barely able to function on an everyday basis as time went by
and no resolution seemed to come into sight. I pushed myself to
shop for a few food necessities far away from the town I had put
my heart and soul into.
I stayed home and worked diligently at my computer and on the
phone searching for answers and help for my cause. I could not
sleep in my bed which Mookie had shared with me, as I lay awake
all night long with questions racing through my mind. I
occasionally slept on the floor of my living room, and but of the
time, I slept on the floor of the deck outside my bedroom. I
began sleeping only between 2-4 hours a night, staying up
researching and typing on my computer until I would fall asleep
from sheer exhaustion. This continued during the entire time
Mookie was gone from my home. Many days I would not have even
gotten up if not for the children in my home I had to care for. I
wanted to just let my mind crawl to that deep dark place inside
that is very difficult to ever come out from. Thoughts of death
as an escape from the mental pain I was experiencing often
crossed my mind. I thank God for my children being the one
motivation for me to go on. I owned several guns and would
contemplate which one, where, and how I could shoot myself to end
this agony. My waking hours were filled with questions. I sought
answers anywhere and everywhere. I tried to keep focused on
praying, yet was not always successful. I had met many wonderful
people on the Internet, in a Native American chatroom I visited,
when I wanted a distraction from my present desperate world. I
had asked every person I met to pray, for Mookie, for me and most
importantly for the people responsible for this tragedy. I knew
people all over the world were praying and it still, sometimes,
was not enough to prevent me from sinking deep into myself and
the never ending mental pain I endured.
Time went on, yet felt as if it stood still. Every day felt like
a year. Time grew close for a court date and I felt hope that a
resolution was close at hand. Then my lawyer suggested we request
a jury trial rather than going before a judge, for a more fair
outcome. I agreed, not realizing that meant another month or so
of waiting. Upon that realization, I went into a nose-dive
straight to mental hell. I felt sheer desperation - this matter
was never going to be resolved and time was growing short for me
to be able to successfully move to a more accommodating state
(meaning more lenient about permits for primates), in regards to
primate private caretaking ownership.
I had a family and numerous animals to consider when moving and
winter was closing in quickly. I felt like I was stuck between a
rock and a hard place. Damned if I was and double damned if I
wasn't. Damned to mental hell, sinking closer and closer to that
point of no return. Some days I realized it and some days I had
no idea of who I really was or what I even was doing. I now have
very little recollection of the past four and a half months of my
life, July until November and don't believe I ever will, with the
exception of a few occurrences.
The teens from town would come visiting to see how I was doing,
an occasional phone call from someone, but I felt forsaken by the
very people I had devoted my life to. My best friend, Roxanne,
stood by me, day in, day out, trying to keep me from going to
that place in hell in my head every time I met with a new
obstacle. Word somehow got out to a few more people and several
did come to visit me and tried to bolster my spirits, but to no
avail. A counselor/friend stopped and told me I was
"clinically depressed" and should see a specialist and
be put on medication. I declined on the basis that I have not
gone to a conventional doctor in years, treating myself with
holistic alternative medicines instead as well as the fact I had
no income and my savings was depleting rapidly. I could simply
not afford to go to a specialist and I knew what I needed for my
recovery, a resolution to my situation and to be reunited with
Mookie, who had become a more integral part of my life than
anyone, including myself, could have ever imagined. I had been
seeing Jamie Walker, an acupuncturist, for close to a year and I
did continue to see her bi-weekly. She had been instrumental in
treating me for several things successfully in the past and was
compassionate enough to allow me to barter with her to continue
to see her during my saga. (Fresh milk from my cow, home-made
butter and farm fresh eggs became my payments to her) She is one
of the few true healers of our present day life I have been
graced to know.
Finally, a suggestion was made to contact a government official.
I started with Olympia Snowe's office and was directed to Rick
Bennett, my local senator from Norway. I called him and related
my entire story to him. He listened attentively and asked several
questions and then told me he would do all he could to help me at
least get some answers from Fish and Wildlife. Mr. Bennett spent
several weeks trying to get information about my situation, but
to no avail. I had spoken several times to him on the phone and
he finally called three weeks after our initial contact to say he
was getting nowhere with Fish and Wildlife and the only recourse
he saw me having was to go to court to get this all resolved. He
had done his very best and all I had was more waiting. I was very
appreciative of all his efforts but was despondent with all the
obstacles being thrown in my path.
I do recall during this period of time, coming up with some very
"imaginative" potential solutions to my dilemma. It
occurred to me that if I got myself ordained as a youth minister
by mail, I could specify my home as a sanctuary and perhaps keep
Mookie here, safely away from the hands of our government because
of religious shelter. Another idea that ran through my head was
to find a psychiatrist who was open to unconventional therapy. I
don't take conventional medicines but I decided Mookie could be
prescribed to me as my therapeutic animal to combat my
depression. I was grasping at any straw possible to be reunited
with Mookie. I felt as if I had been emotionally raped by the
people responsible for all of my pain. My life had been totally
changed with one false accusation leading to an abundance of
unethical actions following it.
I began being very discourteous to people I saw as "the
enemy" and became even more withdrawn from real life
society. I found solace in chatting with the friends I had made
on the Internet. I had people praying all over the world for my
situation, South Africa, Europe, Asia, South America, and across
the United States, people all were holding me up in prayer,
supporting me in the only way they were able. People who had
never ever prayed in their life were now praying for a positive
outcome for me. I knew in my heart many people loved me but it
still was not enough.
Weeks went by, and mentally I got worse and worse. So bad, in
fact, that a dear friend came over, bringing a close friend of
hers and between them, Roxanne and what was left of me, we
prayed. Long and hard, we prayed for the demons trying to
overtake my head to be gone and leave me in peace. Through the
power of prayer and faith, the demons were removed and my head
felt lighter and clearer and more at peace than it had felt in a
long long time. From that point onward I was able to start my
climb back out of that mental hell I had sunk into. I began to
fight with all my heart and soul to not succumb to the powers of
evil. It was at that moment the sift began to occur.
My court date, October 31, 1997, was approaching fast and in the
days right before it was to take place, I contacted many strong
positive people. My previous pastor, shamans, everyone who had
chosen to become involved in my plight. The day of court, as I
traveled to the courthouse, I felt totally at peace. The night
before I also had slept better than in all the preceding months
since this episode began. I greeted my lawyer, we entered the
courtroom and much to my delight, I was informed that the case in
regards to Mookie had been dismissed. I hugged my lawyer and gave
thanks to God for this blessing. I was told to wait until the
following week before calling Fish and Wildlife for a decision on
my renewal permit, now that court was over. I contacted everyone
I knew to let them know the joyous news and we celebrated in
spirit all over the world that night.
On Thursday, November 6, 1997, I drove to my lawyers to meet with
him and make the anticipated call from his office. I eagerly
dialed the number and much to my great disappointment was told
"no decision had yet been made, call again next week."
Despondently, I left the office and drove home, tears streaming
down my cheeks again. Will this never end, I thought, and again
visions of my lethal guns ran through my mind. I mentally
pictured shooting all my animals then turning the gun on my
children and then upon myself. I knew I just needed to get home
and then I would be safe and strong enough to push aside those
horrible mental pictures racing through my mind. Thank God, as
soon as I was home and had gotten in my house, I was able to rid
myself of the dark forces pervading my mind and soul. I called
Roxanne with sobbing tears and dumped all my agony on her. She
was finally able to give me the energy to go on and wait yet more
days for an answer.
The general opinion was that Fish and Wildlife had come to the
realization they had treated me very unethically and were now
trying to save face in any way possible, again at my mental
expense. Each hour seemed like a day and each day seemed like a
year. On November 10, 1997, I began calling daily, asking for an
answer and was given excuses such as, they hadn't received the
court papers, they had been "told" my case was not
dismissed, anything possible to stall giving me a decision.
Again, I fought to stay calm and in control of my emotions
outwardly, while within I was dying a little more with each
postponing answer. Finally, on November 13, 1997, I called again,
seemingly for the hundredth time of rejection, and received the
news I had waited an eternity to hear. Dale Clark, of the Warden
Service, very plainly and matter-of-factly stated to me, my
permit had been approved. I very politely asked that it be
notarized before sending it to me, as requested by The Wise
Monkey Sanctuary, and after a bit of negotiations, I was told it
would be done and sent out the next day, Friday Nov. 14, 1997. I
was also assured a copy would be faxed to The Wise Monkey
Sanctuary that very day. I immediately contacted Tim and Minnie
to let them know my battle was finally over, or so I thought.
Again, nothing in this entire scenario was going to be made easy
for me. I had met a pilot on line who was looking into a free
plane ride to and from Florida for me. I had well wishers all
still praying for this to be entirely over and Mookie back home
here where he belonged and still nothing wanted to go right.
Friday came and went, uneventfully. Saturday, I anxiously awaited
the mail for my permit to arrive. I had been calling airlines to
see about connections, as the free ride was not to be. I also
contacted The Wise's to ascertain their schedules for my arrival
to pick Mookie up to bring him home. The mailman came and, NO
permit. I immediately called the Post Office and asked them to
hold my mail on Monday so as to get my permit then. At this point
I had made reservations to fly to Florida on Tuesday, November
18,1997 and to return home on Friday, November 21, 1997, with
Mookie. I drove to the Post Office on Monday morning and to my
dismay, again NO permit. I was trying to control myself and avoid
becoming frantic. I returned home, again called Fish and Wildlife
and was told by Dale Clark, the permit had not even been mailed
out yet. I very nicely asked her to fax me a copy of it, as my
travel arrangements had already been made. She hesitated until I
insisted a bit firmer and finally was sent the long awaited
paper, with my written permission to posses Mookie legally in the
State of Maine. A copy was also finally sent to The Wise Monkeys
as well, as it had never been sent the day it was promised to be
sent.
Now all that was left to do was to figure out how to pay for my
plane fare. My money had nearly run out (I had used up all my
savings, as I had had no income since July. I had been informed
in July by Dept. of Human Services, where my foster children came
from, that our local police chief had called them and told them I
had a monkey that bit and no children had been placed in my home
since then.) I was going to borrow money from anyone I could when
friends offered to pay my entire way! Don and Brenda Moore paid
for my round trip ticket in full and all I had to do was to drive
to the travel agent to pick them up. Finally, things seemed to be
falling in place. I stopped at Jamie's to have metal seeds placed
strategically in my ears and magnets on my inner wrists to
prevent me from suffering airsickness during flight. My tickets
were in hand and I was packed and ready to go first thing Tuesday
morning. The plane would be leaving the Portland Airport at 7 am.
I could hardly believe the time had come that I was on my way to
get Mookie. I now had everyone praying for a safe flight, as I
had not flown for many years. The ride down to Florida was
peaceful. I was seated next to very nice people on each of the
two jets carrying me to my destination. We had stimulating
conversation and vowed to keep in touch. Minnie Wise was waiting
at the airport for me and I eagerly stowed my two back packs and
the animal carrier I had brought in the back seat of her van. We
hugged and introduced ourselves to each other and I heaved a sigh
of relief. I was there and all in one piece!
We chatted about numerous things as we traveled to their
facility, one of which being the possibility of Mookie holding a
grudge against me for abandoning him so many days before. I had
known there was a very good chance of him rejecting me and the
very thought of it had brought tears to my eyes each time our
reunion scenario ran through my mind. I had been imagining this
moment for more than four months and it was still like a dream
that I was finally there. We stopped at the local market that
donated its excess produce to the sanctuary on the way home. I
tried to remain calm and not burst with excitement as we neared
their place. Finally we had arrived. I got out and looked at
Minnie and she began to lead me around their home towards the
cage Mookie was housed in with another Weeper capuchin, Milo, a
four year old altered female. I was very impressed with all that
I saw in the way of caging and all the animal's demeanors as I
walked out through cages upon cages of primates. Even before he
could see me, he heard my voice and began to call to me, as my
tears ran down my face. The time had come, would he embrace me or
reject me.
As I reached his cage, his call increased in volume and he
reached his tiny hands out the wire to embrace me!!! My heart and
soul sang with joy as the tears, now tears of happiness, streamed
down my cheeks. I took his hands in mine and put my face to his
and began to tell him how much I had missed him. We chattered
back and forth to each other for a while, then I went to the
house to put my things away. He called to me and I assured him I
was not leaving him, just getting settled in. I put my bags away
and helped unload the van, and then had the pleasure of helping
feed the primates at the sanctuary, all 60 of them! Each of the
primates at the sanctuary came there with a story, Minnie
relating each tale to me as we made the rounds at feeding time.
Tim Wise arrived home as we were finishing chores and I had the
pleasure of meeting the man I had shared thoughts with for many
months on the Internet and on the phone. He was exactly how I had
envisioned him to be. We greeted each other with a hearty hug and
went on about our business. When chores were completed, I was
allowed to take Mookie out of his cage and allow myself the
liberty of the moment I had been waiting for all these months. I
put on his waist leash and held him in my arms as he hugged me
for all he was worth, all the while chattering about his
experiences. I felt as if I had died and gone to Heaven to hold
him in my arms again. Time stood still and I finally was at
peace.
Mookie and I enjoyed each others company for several hours and
then Minnie asked if I minded terribly if Mookie spent his last
two nights in the cage with Milo, his cage companion for the past
several months, so she would not be so lonely. I agreed and put
him back for the evening with Milo. He called to me but not
overly urgently. I tried to reassure him I was not going to leave
him and he seemed to settle down. In the house I was allowed to
interact with Minnie's female spider monkey, Budie, who was four
and a half years of age. We cuddled and groomed each other and I
enjoyed every second of it. Then she was put to bed for the
night.
The next day, I again helped with morning feeding chores ,
produce for all of the primates. Then I was treated to a trip to
The Chimp Farm. Well, treat may not be the best way to describe
the facility itself. All the positive qualities I saw at The Wise
Monkeys was severely lacking here at The Chimp Farm. The
conditions were out of your worst nightmare. Chimps were housed
in cages not even tall enough for the chimps to stand their full
height. Most were singly housed in areas no bigger than a small
jail cell. My heart ached for them. Many showed extreme signs of
neurosis and even those caged in pairs were lethargic and
depressing to view. One emaciated female chimp was lying on her
side, the story behind her lethargy was a treatable intestinal
blockage. The pity being the owners would not allow her to be
operated on to alleviate the problem, so she just lay there
waiting to die her slow death. Another sad story behind one of
the caged chimps was an entertainment retiree. This male chimp
had played the part of Cheetah in the old Tarzan movies and due
to his treatment during that time, he now hated all people. I was
informed he tried to hurt and/or kill any human getting within
his reach, thereby resigning himself to total seclusion, devoid
of any social interactions with another living creature. And the
horror stories went on and on.
The only highlights of this trip were my seeing two live gorillas
and three orangutans, but the pitiful conditions of their
captivity far outweighed the excitement I felt in seeing these
magnificent creatures in the flesh. I also was privileged to meet
and interact with one of their young chimps, Anna. She was a
three year old female who took an immediate liking to me and
proceeded to hug and kiss me. We then played jump and tickle for
about fifteen minutes and I thoroughly enjoyed every second of
it. It was my first encounter with a real chimpanzee and I was
amazed at the dense mass of her fifty lb. body and the strength
she had at the young age of three. I now understood more fully
why I had been told in the past how strong and dangerous they can
become as adults. One feel of the grip she had at her age was
enough to last me a lifetime. The owner had to go and I parted
ways with Anna, the memory forever etched in my mind.
Minnie and I returned home, cleaned cages and then took Mookie to
the veterinarians for his health check - up for the trip home, as
mandated by law. He passed with flying colors and we proceeded
home to again feed up all the primates, their afternoon meal of
monkey chow. By now the monkeys had become more used to my
presence and were not as leery of me helping Minnie. I was
pleased they had accepted me so quickly. I was formally
introduced to Coby, their eight year old male chimp and his
female companion, Tina, who was eleven. Coby blew me kisses and
performed several other maneuvers he had learned. Coby had been
trained in using some sign language and he was showing me what he
knew. The intelligence of this beautiful creature was
overwhelming. I watched him as he ate, using utensils, and
displayed compassion towards his companion, Tina, by sharing his
food and toys. Minnie explained to me the subtleties of his
actions and what each expression and motion signified in his
world. It truly was an honor to be introduced to this magnificent
primate.
By the second day I had settled into the caretaking routine for
the primates and was overjoyed to participate without immediate
supervision. I helped feed twice daily and clean by hosing and
raking each of the housing units for the occupants. The smallest
being a pair of Red-Handed Tamarins, others included a pair of
Ring-Tailed Lemurs, several Squirrel monkeys (Common and
Bolivian), numerous Capuchins (Weepers, Black & Whites and
Cinnamons), Spider monkeys (various sub-species), a pair of Patas
(the fastest primates in the world), a beautiful pair of Gibbons,
the pair of Chimpanzees, and last but far from least a Vervet,
Todd, whom had lived with Minnie all of his twenty one years. He
remained outside all day in his area and came in each night to
his own special cage in the house. He was a sweet tempered
altered male who loved to be groomed and I accommodated him every
chance I got.
Before I knew it, Friday morning had arrived and it was time to
return to my home. I made a final round to say good-bye to all
the animals and have one last look at all of these wondrous
creatures I had come to love so quickly. I said my good-byes to
Tim and the children, then Minnie and I loaded my bags and Mookie
in his travel cage into the van and we left for the airport. I
did my best to hold back the tears as I said my good-byes to
Minnie. Her and her family had been incredibly kind and giving to
me and it was hard to leave. They had done more than words could
ever express in caring for Mookie as well as taking me in the
days I stayed with them. The children were wonderful, very well
mannered and, personable. Tim was above reproach, he undoubtedly
cared tremendously for his family and the primates in his care.
The entire family was a shining example of how life should be. I
left with a warm heart and caring thoughts.
The plane ride home was uneventful, again no airsickness and
Mookie was content the entire trip, showing no signs of stress. I
arrived home in Portland November 21,1997 about 4 p.m. to a snow
covered land, far different than the area I had left just hours
before. Roxanne greeted me at the airport with welcome tears in
her eyes. Mookie was ecstatic to see her and chattered
incessantly to her all the way home. We grabbed a bite to eat on
the way home and pulled in my driveway about 7 p.m. My son,
Clayton was anxiously waiting our return and he came running to
us, arms open wide for a bear hug. We went inside and I let
Mookie out of his travel cage and he leapt from one person to
another in greeting, unable to decide who he wanted to see more.
Smiles and tears and hugs and words just poured out from
everyone. Mookie was finally home where he belonged and my saga
had ended..............or so I thought.
Karen Hawkins
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